Although I don't even recall the details, but I remember very quickly picking up on 2 important concepts: AUTISTIC CHILDREN ARE REALLY OKAY AND ACTUALLY TOTALLY COOL EXACTLY AS THEY ARE - THEY WERE MADE THIS WAY FOR A REASON AND THEY ARE SUPPOSED TO BE THIS WAY - IT'S PERFECTLY WONDERFUL TO FULLY EMBRACE THIS AND TOTALLY AND DEEPLY LOVE AND ACCEPT THEM JUST AS THEY ARE! ... and .... AT THE SAME TIME, YOU CAN 1000% BELIEVE IN THE POSSIBILITY OF THEIR RECOVERY!!!
And here I had been making myself M-I-S-E-R-A-B-L-E for the past three years believing the exact opposite.
So do you know what I did???
I SIMPLY MADE A DECISION.....I SIMPLY MADE A CHOICE.....Yes, right then and there, I TRANSFORMED THE BASIS OF MY ENTIRE EXISTENCE ON A DIME.
I'll always remember right afterward, being with my son, as he was doing "his thing" which was twirling his hands and feet, and saying and to myself, " IT'S OKAY...IT'S REALLY OKAY...THIS IS HOW HE IS SUPPOSED TO BE....AND I LOVE HIM COMPLETELY JUST THE WAY HE IS WITH ALL MY HEART AND SOUL, TO THE DEPTHS OF MY VERY BEING". I could feel all the tension melting away, and I could feel myself becoming present with him for possibly the first time.
And do you know what happened???
Within TWO WEEKS, he went from having random words used just to identify objects, to one day, when I came in from being at the store, LOOKING RIGHT AT ME AND SAYING "HI MOMMA"!!!!! AND A WEEK LATER DOING THE SAME WITH HIS DAD!!! From then on, it was simply a matter of staying the course.....and allowing the process to unfold and bloom :-)
Yes, it was MEGA HOURS, COMMITMENT AND EFFORT..... but as far as I'm concerned, if changing my mind is ultimately all it takes, I'M IN!!!
AND LIKE I SAID, IT WORKS!!!!
Next week, my son will be starting 4th grade at a local montessori school with NO provisions whatsoever. He plays sports, makes friends, learns readily and best of all, seems genuinely HAPPY!!!
Trust and Believe!....Trust and Believe!!!
Namaste, Jeannie :-)
How inspiring! I so love that "Trust and Believe!" That's stuff to live on.
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