Props to Google Images

FROM KATRINA: Hello all you fun-loving people out there. I wanted to share a tool that we use a lot a lot a lot a lot (that's a lot of a lots) in the Son-Rise Program at the Autism Treatment Center of America, and that is...(drumroll)... Google Images. I love Google Images! I am so addicted to it for themes that I am not sure I could have worked in the 90's when Google Images wasn't around (just kidding).

For those of you who do not know what I am talking about. Google Images is a branch of the popular search engine Google. You can find it here. All you have to do is type in a word and it will show you millions of pictures relating to that word (here is an example of a Wombat from Google Images - isn't it cute?). It makes preparing a theme so easy. For example, let's say your child likes Sponge Bob. All you do is type in Sponge Bob characters and you get a gagillion spongebob and friend pictures, print them out and stick them around the room. Then give your child rides on a blanket and pick up all of your Sponge Bob friends - sooo easy, and only one idea of a google :)

There, I gave the secret to our facilitation away - it's all in Google Images baby! Okay, there might be more to our facilitation than that - maybe you should come to our Son Rise Program Maximum Impact advanced training course in a few weeks to hear more!!!

Have fun looking up pictures!
Love,
Katrina

It's OK

FROM BECKY: I was reflecting on this past week at The Autism Treatment Center of America and the experience I had with a wonderful Mom helping her 13 year old son by learning The Son-Rise Program. The idea that it's OK to be the way we are came up during one of our discussions. That we can want differently for ourselves but we do not need to judge where we are to want it.

One thing that I learned while in my training to be a Son-Rise Teacher is that if I don't accept and embrace my own challenges, and say to myself that "It's OK" to be where I am (e.g. unhappy, fearful, not trusting, etc), then I am not really doing The Son-Rise Program.

By allowing ourselves to feel these things and not having to change them immediately, we are able to own our discomforts, make friends with them and then change them if we want to or keep them if we want to. Neither way is right or wrong, it's just what we are doing in that moment

When using The Son-Rise Program, the belief that our special children are OK the way they are is essential. By embracing and accepting them just the way they are and not needing to change them, we can fully want the best for them while staying comfortable, present and not judging where they are right now. Ultimately inspiring them to grow without pushing them or pressuring ourselves.

Think of one thing you are doing right now (a discomfort you feel, a belief you have or a behavior you want to change in yourself) and practice saying to yourself "It's OK that I am doing that right now".

I'd love to know how it goes.

Imprints of Love

FROM KATRINA: Hello my lovelies,
This week in the playroom, I was gifted with another imprint of love (it took my fellow staff members and I a few moments to come up with this name - thanks Brandi and Carolina). An imprint of love is what I call a tangible mark left by a scratch, pinch, hit, object being thrown, etc. by a child in the playroom. I call it an imprint of love because no matter what is happening I will always love that child. When I look at that bruise or scar I remember how wonderful that feeling of love is, and how lucky I am to be able to experience the moment through love instead of fear, frustration or anger. I actually enjoy these little reminders.
It's easy and fun to love a child when they are smiling,laughing, and giving you hugs, and I believe it is just as easy to love a child when they are hitting or pinching. I am giving that child such a gift to be able to be with them and love them even in those more intense moments. What is even more wonderful is that the more calm and loving I remain, the easier it is for the child to work through their intensity. I trust that I can take care of my self and help that child use a more effective way to communicate, show their excitement, or get sensory input.

I hope this term (imprint of love)can put a smile on your face as well!

Love to you all,
Katrina

Its All About Perspective

FROM KATE: Here at The Autism Treatment Center of America we believe that what we think and how we feel effects the effectiveness of how we interact with our children. That our love, our excitement, energy and enthusiasm play a vital part in helping our children connect and interact with us.
For a little attitudinal inspiration, click on the video below. For those of you who are on face book right now, click on the title of this blog then on "view original blog, which will take you to where the video is stored. You can also view this video on YouTube.

With love to all of you
Kate

All In Good Time

From Becky: Recently when working with an 33 year old man here at The Autism Treatment center of America I had prepared an interactive theme to take into The Son-Rise program focus room. The theme was ballroom dancing and the focus of the game was to work on having this amazing man dance the waltz with me.

I took the theme in for the first time and whenever this wonderful man connected with me and showed me he was available, I would build up the game by talking about the dance, showing him a printed diagram of the lady and the man part of the dance and demonstrating how it was done.

On my first session with him, I introduced the theme around 4 times in different ways and at various different times, and he would shake his head and tell me "I don't want to" each time. I lovingly respected that and dropped the idea to make myself predictable and trustworthy and continued to initiate the game when another opportunity arose.

The second session with him,I tried again, lovingly and persistently introducing the game and modelling it for him. Again, throughout the session I got many "No's". This was the perfect opportunity to show him he had control and I was user-friendly.

The third time I brought it in, he stood up and came to dance the waltz with me with a big smile on his face. Not only did this beautiful man and I dance the waltz, we also disco danced, did classical dance and rock and roll dancing.

There is so much to say for persistence and not being attached to the outcome. At no point did I "need" him to play this game with me and at the same time, at no point did I let go of the desire for him to play it with me and help him stretch himself in a way he had never done before. All the while giving him immediate control to the many times that he said no.

When using The Son-Rise Program, try taking in your themes or initiating your games more than once. Give your children time to get used to the idea and ultimately decided when they are ready to play the game.

Who is the Teacher and Who is the Student?

FROM GERD: In my 20 years of working/playing with autistic children, I have felt incredibly blessed to have had the most amazing teachers in these children. And I have been humbled into the most grateful student.

I have been hit, kicked, bitten, scratched and poked in the eye - my first response: grow my love bigger...be more accepting and non-judgmental...and of course taking care of myself by perhaps using more physical distance, using words like "Gentle..." or "Oh, I see, if you want to hit, use the pillows/ball..." as a buffer that is safe for both me and the child.

I have been peed on, pooped on and had snot smeared in my face - my first response: grow my heart even bigger...and yes, I can accept even more of who the children are and what they are trying to communicate...and drop all judgments, believing that the children always do their best to take care of themselves. As Bears once said, "The difference between a flower and a weed is a judgment." I can expand on it by saying, "The difference between the smell of a rose and the smell of poop is a judgment."

All my little and not so little teachers are gifting me with endless opportunities to expand my capacity to love, look at them with more and more acceptance and keep dropping more and more judgments until there are no more.

Autistic children have given and continue to give me more, teach me more and help me to stretch myself more than I could have ever imagined.

Thank you and yes, give me more...because I don't know where the end of it is...or if there even is an end at all.

To all the children out there - my ever expanding, loving gratitude...

Your student,
Gerd

Movers and Shakers!

From Katrina: Yesterday I was talking with some Autism Treatment Center of America staff about sensory integration and how our children can connect most effectively when their bodies and nervous systems are in an optimal state of arousal. This reminded me of how at another conference I heard the term Attention Prioritizing Disorder (vs Attention Deficit Disorder) - meaning that children have a hard time paying attention to people or whatever they are "supposed" to be paying attention to, when their bodies are out of sorts.

Here in the Son Rise Program we recognize that when children are isming, they are taking care of themselves so that when they connect they can be with us in a deeper way. We also try to help them and create games based on these isms so that can connect and still take care of themselves. I saw an amazing example of this today.
We have a handsome, tall 13 year old young man with us in the Son Rise Program Intensive this week. He is loving his time here with all of the women facilitators on staff! However, he likes to lounge around on the floor and rarely leaves his corner post, so we are working on this. Today I was with him and we were writing out all of the things I love about him (he likes to write after I do). I love his eyes, voice, smile... but then I noticed he was starting to wiggle, he would sway his body back in forth in a somewhat exclusive manner. I remembered the sensory integration and I decided this was my opportunity to present some physical movement in the game to help him and his body out. I brought the paper to the other side of the room, and I ran back and forth as I wrote the letters to the things I loved about him. Then I encouraged him to get up and copy the letters. For the first time in 2 days I saw him get up and move across the room to interact!!!

I used his need to move as a way to help him connect with me! He loved it and we were able to write many more things I loved about him - his walk, his run - how tall he is! Paying attention to our children's physical needs can help us help their bodies and help them pay attention to us longer.

Have fun moving your bodies in the playroom!
Love,
Katrina

Vote to Support Autism Documentary!

Beautiful Son-Rise and Option friends: Please help support the following endeavor to support a new documentary, "The United States of Autism", which will feature Son-Rise families and our own Raun Kaufman, among other prominent figures in the autism community. They could really use the Pepsi funding to support producing the film, so vote every day!

In a daring move, the Pepsico Company decided in 2010 to forgo their normal Super Bowl advertising and instead give the money away to individuals and charities around the nation in their Refresh Everything Campaign. The only autism organization featured in this month's contest of 729 candidates is the Tommy Foundation, co-founded by two ATCA program graduates who provide support to multiple Son-Rise families through volunteers, funding, and love. They are currently 3rd in the top 10 ideas for the month and qualified for their prize category of $50,000, but they need everyone's support to finish out the month of March strong. Please go to http://refresheverything.com/usofautism to vote every day (you receive new votes daily) for this great cause. Proceeds will go towards a major autism documentary, The United States of Autism, that tells the stories of 20 families across the nation including those using Son-Rise, as well as to provide trainings and support services to individuals on the spectrum. For more information on the film, and to see the latest news and videos, please visit http://usofautism.com/

Imagination

From Kate: Hello everyone - a new game to help you start a new week working with your lovely and beautiful children on the autism spectrum. Here at The Autism Treatment of America we have the pleasure of working with children from all over the globe, in the last month alone we have worked with children from Saudi Arabia, England, Brazil and next week we get to work with one from Australia. Wow! We are so grateful for these wonderful beings, and the creativity that they inspire in us.

We want to share that creativity with you, just click on the video below for our latest game idea, if you are on face book right now click on the title of this blog, then on "view original blog" then on the video itself. You can also see this video on YouTube.

Enjoy and much love to everyone of you

Kate

Sharing Thoughts and Feelings Spontaneously

From Becky: Hello beautiful people! Following on from my last blog about a 33 year old man that we worked with recently in The Son-Rise Program Intensive Program, I would love to share a story about this incredible man.

At the end of his time here, our team of Child Facilitators and Teachers, along with his Mom and his two volunteers gathered with him in The Son-Rise Program focus room where we had been working with him intensively every day.

We were all sharing some special moments we had had with our new friend when all of a sudden, this 33 year old man spontaneously said "I'm happy". If that wasn't enough, then, as his Mom continued to share with him how proud she was of him, he spontaneously told her "I love you".

I just wanted to share that with you!

What A Feeling!

FROM AMANDA: As I sit here writing this blog I would love to describe the feeling I have running through my body. I know many of our Son-Rise parents see us in the playroom when they come for the Intensive or have Outreaches but I am unsure if you know how good we feel after we are done working with your child. I am going share with you my experience as I emerged from the playroom yesterday afternoon.

Wow! I have just stepped out of the playroom after being with an adorable 6 year old autistic boy from Brazil and I am high on excitement. We ismed, laughed and loved each other for 2 hours and it was beautiful. As I walk into the observation room I am met by the grandmother of this boy. She greets me with a gentle hug as she says "I am moved. I have tears in my eyes as I watched you play. You have such a smile and it comes not from your face but from your heart." My eyes begin to mist and I hug her back and say "I am grateful to have met you and to have had the opportunity to be with your amazing grandson." I then leave the building and head back to my office.

As I walk to the office I feel at peace with myself and the world around me. I am full of energy yet I am focused and clear. As I look around I allow myself to reflect on the statement made to me by the Son-Rise grandparent. I am again filled with emotion and I run to tell my teacher of the encounter I had. My teacher looked at me and smiled as she said "Isn't it amazing?". I agreed with her and said "yes" and went off to my desk as we both had to get back to our work.

As I sit at my desk, I think to myself "Isn't IT amazing?" This feeling! This love! This gratitude I have for the Autism Treatment Center of America! This hunger to help a family and their autistic child! This life!

This is how I feel when I come out of the playroom!

I love you Son-Rise Friends and Family.

Love,
Amanda

Overflowing with Gratitude

Dearest Son-Rise friends, students and teachers,
So today is my last day working as a staff member at the Autism Treatment Center of America before I return to the UK to work with families using The Son-Rise Program there (don't worry America - I'll be back!). Over the last few days I have been really taking stock of how incredibly lucky I am to do this incredible work, playing a part in helping so many special children recover from autism. Every day I wake up excited to do the job that I do. Now seems the perfect time to express my gratitude.


To my teachers at the Autism Treatment Center of America and the Option Institue - thank you. You have loved me so profoundly and deeply, you have shone a light on my discomfort and lovingly helped my challenge and change myself. I am the man I am today because of your wisdom. To my fellow Child Facilitators - you are the most beautiful, shining examples of the power of love and joy. The bond you create with every child you work with is unique and incredible. I am so full of love for us all - we are a wonderful family doing great things in the world. Thank you for doing them with me.

Most importantly - to every family and every child in The Son-Rise Program who I have worked with, thank you. You have all taught me the most profound lessons. The pure joy of selflessly loving another; the power of seeing what I want and going for it... so many learnings. Know that I hold each and every one of you in my heart. I find constant inspiration in your dedication, your bravery, your willingness to step up and grow. Every parent and every autistic child - you truly are gifts in my life.

Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you.

With huge love

Jack

The Best Job in the World

From Becky:

Last week at the Intensive Program here at The Autism Treatment Center of America, I had the privilege of working with an incredible 33 year old Autistic man, his amazing Mother and two wonderful volunteers.

This man had been in an institution for most of his life, having little social interaction or communication with others over that period. His diagnosis of Epilepsy along with his Autism left him experiencing intense seizures every week that took hours to recover from.

At the end of the week I was having a conversation with his Mother and she told me the most touching thing. She spoke with tears in her eyes about how she was inspired by him every day. How after all the challenges that he had faced over his lifetime, he was the happiest, sweetest, soul she had ever known and was teaching her so much about resilience in her life.

As I thought about her telling me this, I reflected on the times I had spent working with this man in The Son-Rise Program focus room. The time I had spent joining him looking through magazines, drawing, and twisting a pen in our hands. The wonderful conversations we had had and the times we had laughed together, we had played basketball, charades and danced the waltz together. As I reflected, I once again thought to myself, I really, really, really do have the best job in the world!

Do You Want to be Happier? Know Yourself!

From William: Being unhappy (frustrated, annoyed, angry, sad, bored, depressed, etc.) and continuing to be unhappy stems from not knowing and understanding ourselves very well. I believe we are born happy and learn to be judgmental and negative about ourselves and the world around us, as we grow up. Everyone wants to be happy and enjoy their life yet a lot of people struggle to get there for no other reason than they have not taken the time to understand why they have chosen and continue to choose to be judgmental and unhappy.

How well do we know ourselves? Do we understand why we enjoy what we are attracted to, or why we get unhappy about certain events and situations in our life? I have had many challenges in my adult life where I have reacted in deeply unhappy ways and the only way to find peace and joy again was to first, deeply understand why I wanted to feel this way. Through this understanding I could see myself and the world more clearly and then make a logical choice to be accepting and happy.

The most impactful tool for helping me was the Option Process® Dialogue – a wonderful set of questions that allowed me to really understand my internal maze of thoughts and beliefs. I have continued to do dialogues (with a mentor lovingly asking me these questions) and have done so for many years now – I never get bored or tired about creating a greater clarity and peace within myself. I look forward to them every week.

If you want to be happier – start with knowing who you are and how you tick! Listen to audio tapes on the Option Process, read the PowerDialogues Manual, etc. and know how to help yourself. Equip yourself for this incredible journey of discovery and change. This will really make a difference in your life.

Love and smiles

William

Good Morning Sun - How Ya Doin' ?

From Alison: It's 7am and I am sitting in my bedroom with the first cup of tea for the day looking out at the sunshine (Yes spring is finally here!!!) I can hear other people in the house moving around getting themselves ready to go out but essentially it is a quiet moment. Ahhhh.


So, I start by thinking about all the fun things I have planned for today. It's just Jordan and me all day today as I have no volunteers coming. I love Thursdays because as much as I love having other people play with Jordan there is also something very special about the spaciousness of having a whole day for just us. But then I started to think about all the things that Jordan might do that would not be part of my plan for the day, what if he threw a temper tantrum and broke something, or refused the things I had planned. I realised that suddenly I was not feeling excited about the day at all, that I was hingeing my enjoyment of the day on what Jordan might do. So, I started to ask myself questions from the Option Process dialogue. I realised that what I was wanting was for us both to arrive at the end of the day safe and happy having had loving and nurturing experiences along the way. I then realised that I felt that if Jordan threw a tantrum that in someway that would be bad for me. So knowing that I create my own beliefs I decided that I could choose to believe that the tantrums if they happened would be good for me because I would learn something from them for myself. So now my happiness depends on what I do with what happens today - Good morning Sun - I'm fine : )

Never Give Up Hope

FROM BEARS: He spent 24 years institutionalized...He is now 33 and 9 months ago his mom dared to take her autistic son out of this facility to start a Son-Rise Program. We trained this courageous mom & her staff. Initially, this young man was super withdrawn, aggressive/violent, non-communicative. This week, I watched him work with our staff...he has become a gentle soul, communicating, interactive. Never give up hope.
Love, Bears

Games, Games, Games

From Kate: Another game sent from the Son-Rise Program playroom at The Autism Treatment Center of America to your Son-Rise Program playroom.


Click on the video below, or if you are on face book right now click on the title of this blog, then on "view original blog' then on the video itself, to see a game designed to help your child physically participate with you within an imagination game.

Your own enjoyment of this game is what will make all the difference in how your child responds.

Love to you
Kate

Stamina!!

From Amanda: When you are in the playroom for long hours how do you find the energy to still be the most exciting "thing in the room"? How do you develop STAMINA?

My dear friends, I went on my first outreach this past weekend and it was absolutely amazing. I played with an adorable eight year old autistic boy and we had a most wonderful time together. We bounced, and jumped, and sang, and danced, and played and played and PLAYED for six hours a day.I never ran out of energy as I played with this little boy and I always wanted to be with him.

You may ask, how can the same two people be in the playroom for six hours a day and have so much fun? Well I am here to tell you first hand that it is 100% possible and easy to do when you want to be there.

When I entered the playroom, I didn't think about a clock or when I would have a break. I thought only about how I was going to be with this child and be the most exciting and amazing thing (person) in his playroom. I set the intention of being loving and present in his every move as I joined him and his best friend as we played when he was available. I used an internal magnifying glass to get to know him in our time together as I studied him and his motivations. As he bounced on a ball when he was exclusive I bounced with him and focused on the feelings in my body. When he looked at me I celebrated and used his motivation for bouncing to ask him to bounce with his new friend. I then thought about all the wonderful things we could do as we bounced together to keep the activity interesting. We added songs, clapping rhythms and different silly moves. We bounced high, bounced slow, and bounced all around the room ad we felt each others company.

When this little boy wouldn't put his clothes on it became my mission and my passion to help him want to wear his clothes. He would willingly put his underpants on only to take them off ten seconds later. I woohooed each time he wore his clothes and thanked him as he took them off as well. As we played games I wanted to be creative, loving, and persistent and offer him variety and control. As I worked with my beautiful friend all day on Saturday and again on Sunday it was my intention to stay driven, focused, present, and full of life.

During the course of the weekend my little friend and I played many amazing games together ranging from physical play to sitting and looking at pictures. We danced to the rhythm of joining as we lay on the floor and examined tattered books or bounced on a ball while making sounds. I celebrated hundreds of looks, smiles and sounds, and we both undoubtedly shared a loving connection . So you see, there is no room for running low on energy or wondering when the day will end. When you are present, loving, and in the overall "attitude" there is an endless reserve.STAMINA!

Have fun! Have love! Have energy!

Love,
Amanda

Attention to Detail

Hi Son-Rise friends! Here at the Autism Treatment Center of America we LOVE to notice every tiny detail of what an autistic child is doing. The Son-Rise Program is all about meeting special children at their level to hold their hands as we guide them towards our world. In my mind, the most wonderful, respectful way to do this is to take in EVERY detail of our children. Furthermore, I believe that - by noticing every part of my child - I am allowing myself to LOVE every part of my child.

Take a few minutes and really watch your child: watch them through the lens of your love. Take in the way they sit - do they tend to lean to one side? Is their back straight or curved? Where are they looking? Are they squinting? Do they blink rapidly? Listen to their breathing - is it fast, slow, shallow? How are they moving their hands? Is one of their feet moving? Do they hum quietly to themselves?

Now decide that every single part of your child, everything they do, is meaningful and is beautiful. Focus on filling yourself with love for this incredible miracle that is your autistic child. Decide that every detail of them is perfect.

Now go and rock out your playroom session!

Huge love,

Jack

Responding to Verbal Communication

From Kate Wilde: How do we respond to our children when they make verbalization's that we do not understand?


Click on the video below to see a short clip that demonstrates how we can respond when our children make sounds. The more we consistently respond with a celebration and an action to our child's verbalization's the more likely it is that our children will be inspired to use their verbal communications.
Respond, respond, respond, this is one of the keys to helping our children grow their verbal communication skills.

If you are on face book right now click on the title of this blog then on "view original blog' then on the video itself. You can also watch this video on YouTube.


with love Kate

Toileting 10

From Becky: Drop the level of challenge down a notch!

If you are working on toilet training your child, make that the primary focus. Often we can get so set on inspiring our child to grow that we forget to prioritize the connection.

Here at The Autism Treatment Center of America, the relationship we have with our special children ALWAYS comes first. If you have decided to make toilet training a focus, try dropping your other goals when you're working with the toilet.

If your child is getting familiar with the toilet and you are asking them to look at you, talk to you, participate in your games, etc all at the same time, you may be setting the bar too high.

Try dropping the other challenges when you are focusing on the toilet so your child can relax into creating a desire to use the toilet.

This is the last in my series of 10 blogs on toilet training. To book a 25 minute toilet training consultation with one of our senior Child Facilitators call us on 413-229-2100.

Have fun!

Jack's Playroom Stories #2

Hullo friends :) So here is another wonderful moment that I have had in the Son-Rise Program playroom, here at the Autism Treatment Center of America. Over the last two weeks, the staff here have had the immense privilege of working with the most incredible, sweet 33 year old man with Autism. We have had so much fun helping our new friend tell us what he wants, helping him be more spontaneous, loving him and everything he does. Here is one of my favourite moments with him:

Picture this: a 33 year old man and his 25 year old friend, sat at opposite sides of the playroom. They are both holding plastic markers horizontally in front of their chests, pinching the ends of the pens with their thumbs and fore-fingers and slowly revolving the pens so that the light sparkles off the plastic. Imagine the perfect silence, each friend slowly breathing out and in again as they appreciate the beauty of the sunlight shimmering on their pens. Feel how hypnotic it is, watching the writing on the marker slowly disappear as is revolves away from you. Fill yourself up with love for this beautiful moment, and for the wonderful 33 year old who has shown you how to experience it. Now, hold this state of mind for an hour and twenty minutes. Breathing in and out. Rotating your pen. Watching the sunlight. Bliss.

After an hour and twenty minutes, my wonderful friend looks over at me with the most beautiful smile and says one word: "Jack". My name. He knew I was there. He knew I loved him, and that was enough.

That, my friends, is the beauty and power of joining our special children in The Son-Rise Program.

Wishing you a wonderful weekend

Jack

Teenagers and Safe Internet Usage!

FROM WILLIAM: Raising a 12 yr old neurotypical son, who is now taller than his mom and is slowly catching up to me, is a delight and a challenge. He is at a time in his life when he wants to be treated like an adult and have much more freedom (and he tells us this on a regular basis!) yet still has the inexperience and vulnerability of a boy. It's an exciting time for him as he makes choices about who he wants to be now and the direction he wants to go in as he grows into a man.

One of our challenges as parents of teenagers is how to help, guide and keep them safe as they play in cyberspace. Whether we like it or not the Internet can be very influential in what perspectives and beliefs about the world our children will take on. It has also become an incredible social networking tool. A recent study found that teenagers use their computers an average of 47 hrs a week (Facebook, instant messaging, surfing the net, gaming, etc.) The internet is the door way to the sea of human consciousness - if you can think it then you can probably find it somewhere in cyberspace. This means you will find all the wonderful aspects of our world that you want your child to know about as well as all the things you do not want them to be exposed to and be influenced by (i.e. pornography, etc.).

So how do we let them play and learn in cyberspace while also protecting them?!?! Well last night our local school had a parents night to educate us on the internet, particularly the latest social networking tool - Facebook. The presenter was a local law enforcement official who specializes in this area and did a great job pointing us in the right direction. I want to pass on some of the guidelines they recommended, that I found very useful and hopefully will help you:

High Traffic Area: Have the computer that your child uses located in a high traffic area within the house - kitchen, dining room, etc.

History Rule: For computer usage - your child can only use the computer as long as the history of what websites have been visited is not wiped clean or cleared from the computer's memory. If it is, then they lose use of the computer for a set period of days, weeks, months, (you choose.) Note the same should apply to any ITouch, IPhone, etc. which can access the internet - each of them also has a history page that can be checked.

Password Rule: You as the parent are to know all passwords, especially for social networking programs (Facebook, MySpace, instant messaging, etc.) If your child goes missing the first question the police will ask you is, "Does your child use a social networking program and if so what is the password?" The companies that own and operate these programs will need legal paperwork to release the password to the police and this could take vital hours to get.

Parent Control Software: Use parent control software programs to limit what places on the Internet your child can visit.

Talk to your child: Educate your child about what is smart to share about themselves and what not to. If they want to be on Facebook etc. walk them through the set-up - there are many ways to limit what is shared and who you share it with. Help them learn how to look after themselves.

Regarding Facebook: You need to be at least 13 to use it. They suggest that you (the parent) become a Facebook member and become a 'friend' of your child. Children tend to be BULLIED by people they know, so being one of your child's Facebook friends will help you monitor any such activity.

Use an Avatar: Do not have your child post a picture of themselves, instead have them put up an Avatar (this is an image that represents your child, i.e. a cartoon character, etc.) There are websites where you can get free avatar images.

If you have further questions about how to do any of these suggestions - talk to someone you know who is computer smart or talk to a teacher or technician in your school's computer department. Educate yourself so that you can help your child grow and learn to be the adult you want him or her to be.

One last thing - your attitude as you present these new rules and guidelines is essential. Having a clear purpose for yourself will help you stay loving and clear as you talk to your child. When I talk to my son I focused on this purpose: I love my son and I want to keep him safe as he learns about the world.

Happy parenting!!

With love and smiles,

William

The Miracle of Joining

FROM SIMONE: I was born with epilepsy of the fainting type. After the several tests and scans they performed they also gave me a second and strange diagnosis, "Arrhythmia of the brain" which meant that my brain waves "ticked" faster than usual. Thirty seven years later when my son was diagnosed with autism I came to learn I too had a form of autism or Asperger's Syndrome.

>Just because I was not aware of it, it didn't mean I escaped the customary symptoms, so I used to ism. I had three main isms, rolling my hair on my fingers while staring into space, actually I was imagining some really fascinating stories in my head, talking about Star Wars and making lists. Making lists was my favourite ism. I used to make all sorts of lists but one I made and worked on over and over again was my films I've seen list. One film that featured in all my lists was the so called, in my Mother tongue "My son my world". Not having the facility of recording films kids have nowadays, I kept an eye on TV listings always hoping they would show it again and I could place one more tick on my list.

I don't know how many times I have watched this film but what I think compelled me to watch it over and over again was the fascination I had with the blond lady who decided to join her son doing the strangest things like spinning plates or rocking back and forth, just to be with him, just to love him, and she did that for hours. When I watched it I thought it would be loads of fun to rock like that and secretly desired to do it too, not knowing I was destined to also rock for years!

When my son was two and half years old the word Autism was first mentioned and I straight away remembered "my film" and that it was a true story, so I looked up the title in the internet and the real title and website came up first on the list: Son-Rise - A miracle of love

Since then I have never looked back, I attended the Start-Up in London in 2005 and started running a Son-Rise Program for my son, which I still do.

What compelled me to write about joining was that recently I have been discussing about joining with many other Parents and Professionals and I have noticed that it is often common that the real meaning of joining is forgotten amongst so much information available to Parents nowadays. Many people perceive joining as a means of getting their child's attention, a means of getting them out of an exclusive state into an interactive state, which is often judged to be more important.

What I often tell my volunteers when I am training them is an analogy, the times my child is isming or exclusive is like when we are sleeping and the times my child is interactive is like when we are awake, they are equally important, everybody loves to sleep and complain when they don't get enough of it, yet we don't "do" much when we are asleep but there's a general understanding it's "good" for us. So is joining! Perhaps because I needed to ism I understand how important it was for me to organize my thoughts, to recharge my system, to make sense of the world. When you join your child you are telling them I understand what you are doing is good for you and I will wait as long as it takes and I am delighted you are doing it.

I recently had this discussion with another Parent who thought joining "didn't work" for their child because they would join the child for hours and the child would never be more interactive than before. I thought perhaps it was easier for me because my son has never ismed for long periods of time and I asked myself how long would I be willing to join my son for? The answer came on the following day as if he had heard my thoughts (I often wonder if he does!) because he ismed for 2 hours or throughout my morning session. He then had sessions with three other volunteers when I decided to go back in the playroom for another session. The last volunteer to leave the room said he was very tired, as it was expected, as he had only slept a few hours the night before and was already playing for 8 hours so it was no point to go in the playroom but I insisted because I wanted to see how long he wanted me to join him for. I joined him for a couple of minutes, he came to me, gave me a big hug, a kiss, took me by the hand to a game and we played for no less than one hour, which he had never done before as his attention span is of an average of five minutes.

That day the lesson I took for myself was that joining is a miracle, just as sleeping, when you apparently don't do much, but all your energy gets replaced, when you join your child you don't look at each other, you don't communicate, but you speak a much louder language, the language of acceptance, you are telling your child, it doesn't matter what you do, I am with you, and there's no game you can play or technique you can use to engage your child that will show your child more love, that will create a stronger bond.

Just Because They Don't Speak Yet Doesn't Mean They Don't Know

FROM ALISON: Have you ever wondered what is going on in the head of your child? If they are not speaking yet it can seem like a guessing game to figure out what is going on in there. Well the other day I got a big surprise from my son Jordan, here is what happened.

Jordan is now 12 years old and has been speaking for quite a while now thanks to the work done in his Son Rise playroom. In the days before Son Rise, Jordan spent alot of time in front of the television watching his favourite programs: Teletubbies, Balamory and Come Outside. When I started doing Son Rise I blocked the childrens television channels on the sky box so he no longer had access to these programs. In those days Jordan was not able to speak and so silently watched these programs over and over and over again.

The other day when we were in the playroom he said "When Jordan was a little boy, Jordan watched Teletubbies," and then he sang the theme tune with all the words, then he did the same for Come Outside and then Balamory. Every word was there!! Then he started to talk about things that had happened in the programs; so even though he wasn't speaking yet, he totally understood what he was watching and now was expressing his excitement with the programs that he had so enjoyed all those years ago. I was amazed at the clarity of his memory and the vocabulary that he had picked up but not expressed as a small child. It was all there!!! Our children are amazing.

Toilet Training Take 9

FROM BECKY: Celebrate Celebrate Celebrate!

It's time to rejoice in the toilet! When toilet training your child help them to know that they are ALWAYS successful.

When they look at the toilet celebrate them, when they touch it, celebrate them, celebrate them when they say "No", make your child's favorite toys pretend to go to the toilet and then celebrate the toys.

Celebrate your other children for using the toilet, celebrate your spouse for using the toilet, celebrate the dog for peeing the pooping. The main thing is that you celebrate.

Make your definition of success not on how much your child pees or poops in the toilet but on how much fun you have in the process! That way, you are going to help them in these ways.

1) You will inspire them to WANT use the toilet.

2) They will be more likely to keep trying if you are having fun regardless of whether they use the toilet or not.

3) They will ALWAYS feel successful even if they don't actually go.

4) Having fun will take the pressure of toilet training for the whole family.

5) It will feel better.

Have so much fun!

Try It!

FROM JACK: Have you ever been in your Son-Rise Program playroom and decided to veto an idea because you didn't feel it was fun enough or appropriate? Have you ever given up on a theme idea because your child didn't seem interested the first time around? It's easy to make assumptions about what our autistic children will or won't like, but we at the Autism Treatment Center of America really believe that to help our special children recover then the fewer limitations we place on them, the better!

Here's the thing - if we never offer our children something new and exciting (a game they've never seen before, the opportunity to say a new word) then we're never offering them the chance to discover something new they may love! Think about it in terms of your own lives: how many times did you try a new food before you really liked it? How many times did you listen to a new song before loving it? It can often take us time to embrace something new, but persistently coming back to it can open up whole new fun experiences for us. Our autistic children are just the same. I so strongly recommend to you that you DO always try new games and new activities with them! Be persistent! Give them time to become used to what you are presenting and the sky is the limit when it comes to thinking of motivations.

Big love to you all - I would love to hear your stories about new games you have tried with your children!

Jack

Child's Motivation is Key

FROM JAMIE: Using our child's motivation is key....Tyler loves to go to my parents house at the end of the day to ride the four wheeler & swim. This adventure is a huge motivator for Tyler. I have been using this motivator to help Tyler with goals I have been working with her. Today I told Tyler I would love for her to brush her teeth before we left. (I usually have her come into the bathroom with me and she will take the toothbrush and then hand it to me to brush her teeth). I went upstairs to gather a few things & within minutes heard the electric toothbrush. Tyler was brushing her teeth as I had requested. She had NEVER brushed her teeth by herself with the electric toothbrush before! She did this by herself for the first time and did it upon request. How awesome is that??? Hooray Tyler! A task that has been so difficult for her - she accomplished that day! Love and Hugs and Celebrations to you Tyler ..... XOXOXO Mom

The Unhappiness Compensation Cycle!

FROM WILLIAM: We use many different wonderful ways of looking after ourselves, especially when it comes to ensuring that we stay emotionally feeling good. One particular way that I want to share with you is what I call the Unhappiness Compensation Cycle. It goes something like this:

We use many different wonderful ways of looking after ourselves, especially when it comes to ensuring that we stay emotionally feeling good. One particular way that I want to share with you is what I call the Unhappiness Compensation Approach. It goes something like this:

I feel uncomfortable in one area of my life, which I don't want to look at or pay attention to because if I do I will feel even more uncomfortable. (I'm discomfort-phobic!!)

I can't totally shake this uncomfortable feeling (it keeps following me around – even though I do my best to ignore it!!).

I go in search of something that I know will result in me giving myself a good feeling (i.e. eating, drinking, shopping, particular actions that will get me praise and love from others, etc.) - I go into unhappiness compensation mode!

The drawback of compensating in this way for an uncomfortable feeling is that after I have done any of these "feel good things" I am still left with my unhappiness. Most people do more and more of the "feel good things" to the point of personal detriment (i.e. over eating, over drinking, etc.) They then get into a cycle of compensating for this nagging, won't-go-away unhappy feeling by doing these "feel good things" over and over again - and in the end they end up harming themselves.

So, what's the solution? The solution is to look directly at what you are feeling unhappy about - to understand it - and then change the belief that fuels it.

This is exactly what a mother did recently during the Son-Rise Program Intensive. She was working with her child - but she pushed him to play her game, needing it to happen, and did not see that he was not connected or interested. She needed the interaction so that she would get praised and loved for making it happen. She needed the love because she was feeling upset in another area of her family life. She was trying to feel good in the only way she knew how - to do something else to compensate for not feeling good in that other area of her life.

After, during our feedback session, she chose to work out the underlying unhappiness in her family life that fueled her need and pushiness. As I dialogued her, she cried and talked about the situation and eventually came to a place of insight and then a place of peace. It was wonderful to see the change in her expression as she gave herself this feeling. She was brave to have looked at herself so honestly with a willingness to know who she was.

One of the beauties of the Son-Rise Program is that we come to understand how we can be happier through changing our beliefs (using the Option Process Dialogue) versus ignoring and avoiding our discomfort and creating a harmful compensation cycle!

Today - dare to look at a discomfort. Ask yourself a question or two (i.e. How do I feel? Why am I feeling this way? etc.) Dare to understand yourself a little more and learn to enjoy your life without having to compensate.

Love and smiles,

William

The Head Band

FROM KATE: Another great creative tool to help you design fun and exciting interactive games with your children. This will help not only lengthen your child's interactive attention span, but also encourage your child to look at you more.

Just click on the video below. If you are on Facebook right now - click on the title of this blog, then on "View original blog" which will take you to where the video is stored.

Enjoy being silly and playful with your children.
With much love to all,
Kate

Toilet Tips 8

FROM BECKY: Toilet Training an Older Child!
All the same techniques from this series of blogs apply to older children too. Experiment with modifying your explanations and celebrations in an age appropriate way.

If your child is into science, show them a diagram of the human body and how it works, how our bodies break down food and what happens to it. If they like music, make up a rap about the toilet. Talk to them about what it feels like to know when you have to go and how you can relax and focus so much more once you have been.

Give your child privacy to check out the toilet on their own and spend time getting used to being in the bathroom.

I once worked with a 15 year old boy who did his first pee in the toilet ever while at our Intensive Program here at The Autism Treatment Center of America

Have fun!

10 New Ideas!

FROM JACK: OK, so here are some more fun ideas you can try in the The Son-Rise Program playroom using everyday household objects. Today, let's do 10 quick game ideas you could try using a handkerchief! Remember - YOU create the fun in the game, not your prop. It is your enthusiasm and committment to your game that will make it enticing for your autistic child.

1. Blowing Contest! Work on physical participation and flexibility with your child by having a competition to see who can blow the handkerchief up in the air the longest! You could add an extra element by taking turns and asking your child to count the seconds and keeping score!
2. Who's behind the Handkerchief? Hide your face behind the handkerchief and help your child with their eye contact by popping out from behind it as a different animal each time. Make big, funny sounds and animated facial expressions to inspire them to look at you.
3. Silly Noise Machine - half stuff the handkerchief down your sleeve. Invite your child to physically participate to pull on the handkerchief. Them pulling on it causes you to make silly sounds.
4. Find the Tickle! If your chld likes tickles, initiate a fun tickle game when they are available. Then hide your hand under the handkerchief and request them to pull it off so you can give them more tickles.
5. Where's the Treasure? Hide some "treasure" (e.g. a picture of a character they like) somewhere in the playroom. You are the pirate sent to find the treasure but your map (the handkerchief) has had the ink washed off! Encourage your chld to help you make a new map, working on their verbal participation. Give them fun prompts such as "I remember there was a scary forest somewhere on this map" then once the new map is made, go on an adventure to find the treasure!
6. What does my voice tell you? To help a child understand intonation, use the handkerchief to blindfold each other (if your child will let you). Your child's role, once blindfolded, is to guess how you are feeling from the sound of your voice. Really exaggerate the emotion in your voice to help them along. Encourage them to blindfold you and then THEY can play with communicating emotion through the tone of their voice.
7. Blow blow blow! A simple game for children working on clear single words - once your child is engaged with you, lie on the floor and, in an animated way, blow the handkerchief as far as you can across the playroom, modeling the word "blow". Be really fun and silly as you do this - many children love to see things blown around the room. Once they are motivated, help them say "blow".
8. Sticking spot! Use some artist's tape and stick the handkerchief to the floor of your playroom. When your child is available, initiate a fun chase game. But, when you tread on the handkerchief, you suddenly become stuck! Help your child say the word "move" to free you and continue the chase game.

Feel free to post any of your own ideas or modifications to any of these games, and have a wonderful time trying them out!

With laughs and smiles,

Jack

Toileting - Take 7

FROM BECKY: It's a gradual process

The first step to toilet training your child is to get them used to what you are working on. It's rare that we as people immediately start performing a new skill perfectly, we need warm up time to study and familiarize ourselves with the material before we get it right.

Let's make the first focus be promoting how fun the toilet is, talking about the toilet, celebrating all of our child's interest in toileting and modeling how to use and why to use the toilet to them before we actually ask them to put their pee and poop in it.

Our children like things to be familiar and predictable. By making the toilet a focus without actually inviting them onto it first, our children get to grow accustomed to what we are introducing to them, therefore when it comes to using the toilet, they already know and trust what it's all about.

It can be tempting to "Push" the challenge with our children when we are hungry for them to develop new skills. If you take your time and have fun along the way, both you and your child will be more motivated to keep trying.

Assumption - Assumption, What's Your Function?

FROM KATRINA: Hello all you amazing people,
I'd like to talk a little bit about assumptions of what your child can and can't do. Here’s the thing...the possibilities are endless, so why limit your child? Just because you've never seen your child do it before, does not mean he/she cannot do it today!

This week we have an amazing Man here at our Son Rise Program Intensive. He is 33 years old, he's an adult and he would be the first to tell you that! I wanted to do something more adult with him so I had our amazing Option Institute property department (Bob and Ashton - you guys are AWESOME!) put together some materials so this autistic man and I could build our own stool. (If you are interested they also tell me you can buy Do-it-yourself kits from hobby shops). The family had never before seen their son build anything, they thought he would cringe at the sound of a hammer, and would not know what to do with a screwdriver.

Even though he had never done anything like it in his life, my friend and I built this stool in its entirety. He was putting together wood, hammering nails, grabbing the screws and turning them before I had the chance. Any time he said he couldn't do something, I gave him another opportunity and he did it!!! Even I was impressed with how quickly we put that piece of art together.

After my session I took out the stool to ensure that it was sturdy and nothing was sticking out to far. When I brought it back in, my friend looked at it, said "It's done nicely" and immediately sat on it. It has been his stool of preference ever since. What a charmer!

Next time you think your child can’t do something, think again!

Wishing you a week of possibilities,
Katrina

Sleep - Take 2

What to do when your child won't stay in their bedroom when it's time for you to leave?

Firstly make sure you start the bedtime routine at the same time in the same order each night, this will help your child to get a sense of what is coming next, thus giving them a sense of control and predictability.

It is important for you to help your child be able to get to sleep on their own verses using you as a sleep tool. Follow the link below to a previous blog I wrote on this particular subject:

ttp://www.autismtreatmentcenter.org/blog/2009/04/sleeping-children_10.php

Thus it is helpful for you to leave your child's room before they actually fall asleep.

If your child comes out of their bedroom do some version of the following.

1. Adopt this thought, "My child has been loved and played with all day, he is well fed and now the only thing it is time for is sleep, he will get many benefits from his sleep, more than me playing another 30 minutes with them" - Your child may try to convince you that they "need" many different things "before" they go to sleep, this is just a ploy to get more time with you.

Their job is to push the boundary - your job is to hold it firm for them.

2. Sweetly take them back to bed, letting them know that it is time for them to stay in their bedroom and sleep. Do this as many times as it takes, do not play with them or try to engage with them, this will only make the process fun and interesting for them, you want them to understand that you mean business - it is time for them to stay alone in their bedroom to sleep.

One Mom who implemented this with her child had to take her back to bed 30 times on the first night, then 22 times the second night, then only 2 the third night and that was it. It is your consistency and follow through when helps our children know that it is time for bed.

Wishing you all a peaceful nights sleep :)

Kate

10 Fun Game Ideas!

From Jack: Here are 10 easy, fun ideas of games that you can do with the simplest prop imaginable - a bucket! Seriously, in the magic world of The Son-Rise Program ANYTHING can be fun and ANYTHING can be the doorway to an amazing interaction as you help your autistic child grow and change!

1. The Magic Cauldron - You are the bubble/squeeze/tickle (or whatever your child loves) witch and your child has to stir your magic bucket-cauldron to help you make the bubble/squeeze/tickle spell and then they get the thing they are motivated for! Encourage their flexibility through physical participation! Expand this fun game by adding a list of ingredients that need to be added before the spell will work (e.g. two scarves, a toy car and a blue marker).
2. A rock-star drum! Turn the bucket upside-down and drum on it! Sing your child's favorite songs and rock out together! You can work on different challenges depending on where your child is: clear words (e.g. "music"), verbal participation (e.g. your child sings while you drum), physical participation (e.g. your child drums while you sing).
3. Help your friend around the playroom - put the bucket on your head and have a fun, silly time wobbling around the playroom, bumping into things. Your child's role is to verbally guide you safely around the playroom. You could even take turns!
4. The tickle bucket! There's a tickle monster hiding in the bucket - any part of your child's body (e.g. legs, arms) that they put in the bucket will get tickled! Encourage their physical participation in this fun, simple game.
5. Hiding animals - turn the bucket upside down. Tell your child there is something hiding under the bucket, but you don't know what it is! Slowly lift up one side and make a crazy animal sound! Your child's role is to guess which animal is under the bucket. Once they have done so, either swap and encourage your child to make the animal sounds, or come up with a different animal for your child to guess.
6. Fly to the moon - if your child is small and light enough, invite them to stand in the bucket and fly them around the playroom. Once they are motivated you could help them to say the word "fly".
7. Spin the bucket! Stick different motivating activities in a large circle on your playroom floor (e.g. tickle, squeeze, sing, ride). Place your amazing bucket in the middle of the circle and spin it. Whichever activity it ends up pointing towards will be what you do with your child! Take turns spinning your bucket and helping lengthen your child's attention span with all these different games!
8. Guess what's in the bucket! To help your child ask questions, place one of their favorite things in the bucket and put it on the top shelf so your child can't see what is in it. Tell them that one of your child's favorite things is in there and your child has to guess what it is. Model questions they could ask (e.g. "Is it something you wear?" "Is it red?") and celebrate in a huge, fun way when they guess!
9. Dodge the bucket! Have a fun time with your child rolling the bucket at each other, while the other one tries to dodge out of the way! Once one of you gets "hit" then swap over who is rolling and who is running.
10. Playroom firemen - encourage imaginative and symbolic play by pretending that there is a fire in the corner of the playroom and you have to rescue your child's favorite character (Bob the Builder, Barney, The Wiggles). You could fill the bucket with scarves or paper and pretend that it's water as your playfully splash it around to put out the fire!

See how something as simple as a bucket can be the source of SO much fun and silliness!

Have a wonderful time playing

With love,

Jack

Sleep

FROM KATE: Sleep - arrrhhhh what a great word that is, MMMMMM sleep is so rejuvenating, and healthful for our bodies. When we sleep our bodies only concern is to repair and regenerate. When running a Son-Rise Program sleep plays a vital role for you as parents and also for the health and well being of your child.

When we as parents are rested then everything we do during the day will be easier Like most of you I have experienced long stretches of days with "sleep deprivation" and even with a great attitude it can be challenging. For new born babies - this is unavoidable, but once our children no longer need to be fed at night, you can do things that will help your children sleep through the night for 10-12 hours!
Which means in turn that YOU can sleep.

Oftentimes we are taking care of what our children are eating putting them on great diets for Autistic children, giving them healthy vitamins and supplements, carefully measuring out the timing and the amount of food and supplements we give our children, but don't give the same about of care and structure to the sleeping routine of our children.

Sleep routines are formed by habit, I wake up at 6am each morning even if I do not have to get our of bed at that time, or no matter what time I went to sleep the night before, simply because my body has created this habit. We as the adults can help our children stick to a bedtime routine to help their bodies remember a pattern of sleep that is useful for them.

How to create a sleep routine for our children on the Autism Spectrum, or their typical siblings.

1. Believe that it is possible.
2. Do not start a routine unless you believe that you can follow through with it. Your children will know if you do not intend to keep to the routine.
3. Believe that if you and your child sleeps, then everything else you do for your child during their waking hours will be so much more effective.
4. Pick one and stick to it, do not vary it. This is not about helping your child interact with you, it is about helping your child understand that it is time for bed, that they can put themselves to sleep and sleep through the night.
5. The routine can be anything you want it to be, its up to you, just stick to it.

A sample routine.

1.At 6.30pm the house becomes very calm, the lights are dimmed, click on the link below for the C D "Sleepy Baby" a great CD to play when you want your child to become sleepy. No rough and tumble games are played anymore.
http://www.amazon.com/Music-Babies-Sleepy-Brahms-Mozart/dp/B000068IFD/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=music&qid=1267554900&sr=8-1
2. 6.45-7.15pm - bath time and PJ's.
3. 7-7.15-7.30 - two stories, one song, and a kiss on the head - then Mom and Dad always leave.

Remember this is just a sample - you can create one with different time lines, and different steps according to what will work for you and your child, the trick is YOU keeping to it.

Blogs to come, "What to do when your child gets up during the night."
"What to do when your child keeps leaving his room and won't stay in his bed."

Here's to a good night sleep for all.
Love to you and your lovely children
Kate

From Kelli: Who IS this program for?

Last week we participated in the Son-Rise Program Intensive, and boy what a week. I think I have enough material to blog daily for a month. Material about Jordyn, about us, and about the program. I'm going to endeavour to keep my insights "simple" and relevant to all, so I don't overwhelm or bore you all with the inner workings of my mind.

One of the themes of my week was my "need" to CONTROL - the program, the volunteers, myself in the playroom (strategizing and thinking vs. being free). My experience of myself, and all of it, was it was never quite enough, and I was always striving for more... like a donkey with a carrot, or a hamster on a wheel.

This is also a theme in life where I'm never quite satisfied, so no accident that it showed up in the playroom. The funny thing is that I am completely satisfied and accepting of Jordyn, and have tons of love and acceptance for my volunteers... so why the carrot/pressure? Why did I "have to" be on guard all the time, looking for what is next, and not missing a cue?

Well, in exploring this in feedback with one of the teachers I could not see it when asked "why?" But looking at it from the other side - "what would happen if I didn't" - it became really clear. If I didn't "keep the pressure on" I would look back and regret not doing or being more. So, really I was putting myself through all this pressure so that someday I wouldn't look back and hammer myself with "you really could have done more". Interesting.

Knowing that I am doing the very best that I can in every moment with the beliefs that I have, that seemed like a really silly way to live. Discarding the carrot, I am free to be present in this moment. I am present to the joy, adventure, and love of the journey. AND seeing clearly what is in front of me, gives me a clearer picture of where to head next. Not having the carrot doesn't mean I stop looking for what is next - it just comes from a happier, curious, joyous and grateful place - a want vs. a need.

The program IS really for ME - to be happier, grounded, grateful, and fulfilled.

And, when I'm happy, grounded, grateful, and fulfilled I am all the things that I was striving for... naturally AND that little guy is drawn to my comfort with myself. He is such a teacher... all I have to do is look at who I'm being with him, or even just look at what he is doing and I learn about myself.

Enjoy your journey. Love - Kelli

From Samahria: ABA vs. The Son-Rise Program Videos #4 and #5

I am so excited that we get to send you two new videos in the ABA vs. The Son-Rise Program series. Why? Because I especially love these two videos. You may not know that I love to laugh and find humor in everything. When I saw the FUNDING video, I laughed aloud. It's hard to believe that in these days of freedom of expression - children's rights, legal rights of all kinds, as well as animal rights - we don't have the right to receive state/government/insurance funding for whatever Autism treatment we choose for our child. Have a look (and a laugh!) - and then pass on to your contacts.
Now, for the video that gets me right in the heart - RELATIONSHIPS & FRIENDS. When I first started working with Raun in our bathroom way back then, I (like you) dreamed of the day my little boy would connect, interact and talk with us. But I also wanted him to have social skills to know the joy and love of having real friends of his own. That happened - as well as developing academic skills: learning colors, mastering mathematics...and ultimately writing funny video scripts. It's really all about relationships. We hope you will continue to share with your friends and contacts this FRIENDS video.
Now it's time to get yourself laughing when you view these short, easy messages to help new families understand the differences. With lots of love and gratitude, Samahria Lyte Kaufman Original Son-Rise Program Mom Co-Founder of the Autism Treatment Center of America

Autistic Communication

From Amanda: Hello Beautiful Son Rise Friends and Family,

What does it feel like to be on the Autism Spectrum? Hmmm! No one really knows the answer to this question accept the Autistic person him/her self. Wouldn't it be nice to know!?

I just watched a beautiful story about Amanda Baggs. She is an Autistic woman who has many different exclusive and repetitious behaviors and doesn't use verbal communication at all. Although she doesn't use verbal communication she will type 120 words a minute and describe in detail her experiences of being autistic. She explains that her repetitious behaviors are her communications with her environment and it's her form of language. She says "the world views her failure to speak as defiant yet other people's failure to learn her language is seen as natural and acceptable".

Here at the Autism Treatment Center of America we want to learn the language by which people with Autism communicate. It is our belief that ever thing the child does has a purpose for either expressing a want or a not want; or it is a way for the child to take care of him/her self. An example of this may be when an autistic child covers their ears as a parent speaks to them; Some may think they are being oppositional and are misbehaved while our Son Rise Program views it as an opportunity to learn and listen to what the child is saying to us. Maybe they want you to speak softly or more slowly so they can process the information? When the autistic child is hitting their hands against a wall or repeatedly jumping up and down on the ground; Some may look at the child as hyper active and unable to sit still while the Son Rise Program looks at the child and asks "how we can help this child meet their sensory input needs". Maybe their body is craving pressure on his/her joints and they are communicating this by showing us with actions and not words. As the Autistic child dances back and forth to the rhythm of their own music; Some may view this as inappropriate while we at the Son Rise Program believe this is a dance often done so child can center him/her self in this universe.

When you look closely at Autism through loving, judgement free eyes, you may notice that people with Autism don't lack communication at all. They actually have an ability to communicate with the universe far more advanced than many of us can begin to comprehend. They immerse fully into their surroundings and are super present with the environment. They are communicators with the universe and we are due to learn this amazing language.

At the Autism Treatment Center of America we believe all communication is language. Let's love it, join it, and learn this wonderful language!

From Kate: Building Ideas

Click on the video below to see some building ideas that you can use with your child on the Autism Spectrum. As always, it isn't the game itself that is important when encouraging our children to interact with us, but how much WE are enjoying what we are presenting to our children.

Do let us know how these ideas are helping your children - and do post any variations and experiences you have using theses so that other parents can benefit form your experiences.

If you are on Facebook right now, click on the title of this post, then on"View Original Post", then on the video itself. You can also view this video on YouTube.

Much love to you all
Kate